Rx: lose the lard or quit running

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Dennis the Menace, 9/10/20

Well to be honest does anybody actually read Blondie, 9 Chickweed Lane, or Judge Parker?

Judge Parker, 9/10/20

Oops, I guess somebody does! Ahem so it looks like Ronnie Huerta is headed back to L.A. without Neddy, who has rediscovered the charms of room and board on Abby’s dime in rustic Cavelton. But I’m torn. On the one hand, Ronnie was the sassy gf who called Neddy on her copious B.S. — an endless, unpleasant, and valuable public service. But on the other, she’s one of a class of characters in Judge Parker and Sally Forth who daily undermine, hijack, or derail everything the main characters say. You never really finish a conversation with her, Norton, Toni Bowen, Sally’s team at the office, or Ted Forth without them steering it off into some metanarrative, stunt, non sequitur, distraction, hallucination, or wisecrack. Look, she’s doing it right up there! It’s annoying, and it mucks up the pace, which in the case of Judge Parker is legendarily slow to begin with.

So c’mon, Ronnie! Let Neddy gush about Cavelton for a few insincere minutes before you shut her down and hug it out. It’s probably the last thing you’ll do before you flicker out of existence forever, so make it a good one! Say hi to Aria, Chad Duncan, and the Thorp kids!

Gasoline Alley, 9/10/20

Idiot rustics attempt some extremely low-stakes con, part XXVII.

Funky Winkerbean, 9/10/20

With any luck, your corpse will be Board certified!


— Uncle Lumpy